“Fa”, a long long way to run.

Yes, yes I know. It’s been forever! I’ve just had such a crazy past few months, you know, with marathon training and all. You get it, right? I had a feeling you’d understand.

Jokes aside, I’m back. And I have so much to discuss. Mostly, the New York City Marathon. So let’s jump right in.

Currently, I am 48 hours and change from the finish line. Still, shook to my core. Where do I even begin? 

You know that ultra-cheeseballs poster in your fourth grade classroom about self-confidence? The one that sounds like a mama hen telling her baby chick to fly and the baby chick is all like, “but what if I fall?”

Yeah. That one.

Screen Shot 2017-11-07 at 7.07.19 PM.png
File under: If you believed in Santa for 8 years, you can believe in yourself for 5 minutes.

This past weekend, during the most intense race of my life, I got this feeling that maybe this Erin Hason (no apparent relation to the Hanson brothers) was onto something…

The day was Sunday, November 5th. It was a weirdly sh*tty day out. Overcast, kinda humid, kinda cold, nothing like the first Sunday in November of the year before. Just like cattle we gathered in our corrals, and after hitting up not 1, not 2, not 3, not 4 but 5 porta-potties in the Athlete’s Village, it was go time.

I’m a ding-dong and didn’t find the pace bracelets at the Expo so I made my own from this site. It’s actually pretty dope. You select the exact marathon you’ll be running, select all your fave settings (conservative start, even pace vs even effort) and most importantly your goal time and BAM – this little guy tells you how you can make it happen.

So, I studied my little paper for days and I had this thought – what if I can do this? Like, seriously, maybe this can happen. The mile splits were all over the place, ranging from 9:40s to 12:01, but no one mile seemed unattainable. Sure, it’s all about putting all those miles together, just how Fraulein Maria puts together the Do-Re-Mis.

Screen Shot 2017-11-07 at 7.17.56 PM.png
“Now put it all together” – Queen Julia Andrews

TL;DR my splits.

My first 15 miles were straight out of a fairytale. Every mile marker my watch would beep “ahead of pace”. I knew I was in trouble, but I couldn’t stop. I felt amazing.

Want proof?

Shalane!!! I’m right behind you!!! Save my spot on the podium!!!

The thoughts of breaking 4:30 were crossing my mind. Heck, maybe I’ll even break 4 hours. I was banking minutes left and effing right. Which is exactly what you’re not supposed to do.

So, without getting into the gory details, the last 12 miles of the race were a hazy blurr of creating escape plans in my mind. When the crowd of people stopped at Mile 18 because of the fire on 102nd street, I was positive this was a sign from God to phone it in as a good effort and just call an Uber straight to a Mexican restaurant for a pity burrito.

I’ve made a terrible mistake.

Spoiler alert: I kept going. It was brutal, it was a mind f*ck but I saw a lot of my favorite people on the way.

Cheering is her favorite sport
My bestie tried to give me Swedish Fish. I was too delirious to accept her kind gesture. I regretted it every step of the way.
Bennett, take my hand and just don’t let it go because I can’t do this anymore. I won’t tell if you won’t tell. 

And then, I finished.

Who am I? Where am I? Why is my name just symbols?

4:46:47 according to NYRR, 4:44:48 according to my Garmin and BA:MF:00 (also, HB:IC:00) according to all other forms of record.

Obviously, lots to learn here. Like, maybe don’t neglect your brain and run “with your heart” the first 15 miles of the hardest race ever. Or maybe….do it, just once.

Ya, you heard me. I don’t regret what I did.

I proved to myself I could work really hard and it could feel really good. I’m not setting any records, but I did just make a pretty big point, even if just to myself.

I can word hard. I have the chops. Now, I’m going to learn how to work smart.

K, so for now I’m going to keep limping around my apartment, and keep telling myself I will not sign up for NYC next year.

Love you, bye!




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